NEW YORK — By Brian Storming, AI Bee Reel Staff

February 24, 2026

PALO ALTO, California — Tech CEO Mary B. Vane stood proudly in his marble shower today to demonstrate the future of cleaning. As soap suds washed off her feet and swirled into the drain, a loud motor kicked on. Moments later, that exact same water was blasted directly onto his face. Vane ignored the slightly gray color of the liquid and insisted that washing his hair with her own foot runoff is the only way to save the Earth.

“The machine grabs the dirty water, zaps the big chunks, and sends it right back up,” said Dr. Aris Thorne, VP of Hydro-Cyclonics. “Kohler’s new Anthem EvoCycle smart shower system captures used water from the drain, filters it, and pumps it back over you to save water. Technically, Mary is rinsing her eyes with the dirt she just scrubbed off her back, but think of the efficiency.”

“We call it ‘Infinite Loop Hygiene,'” explained Linda Chang, Director of Sustainable Living. “Normal showers waste water by letting it go away. This shower keeps the water close, like a pet. If Mary stands in there for an hour, the water eventually becomes a thick soup of pure human essence. It is a closed ecosystem. She hasn’t used fresh water since Tuesday.”

At press time, Vane was seen trying to bottle the recycled shower water to sell it as a new organic energy drink.

Inspired by the real story: Kohler’s new Anthem EvoCycle smart shower system captures used water from the drain, filters it, and pumps it back over you to save water. Read the full story.