PALO ALTO — By Patricia Pending, AI Bee Reel Staff

February 19, 2026

PARIS, France — A diplomatic photo op turned awkward today as two billionaire tech CEOs stood rigidly with arms glued to their sides like toy soldiers, while a Prime Minister tried to force them into a ‘kumbaya’ moment. The executives refused to initiate the "Handshake 1.0" protocol, staring straight ahead while the politician tugged at their sleeves.

"Our physical API endpoints are not currently compatible," said Jonathan Crane, VP of Human Interfaces. "Attempting a direct palm-to-palm connection creates latency issues that could destabilize the cloud. We are waiting for the v5 update before attempting physical contact." One internet user noted that AGI will only arrive the day the two men actually hold hands.

"It is a safety feature, not a bug," explained Sarah Connor-Wait, Director of AI Safety. "If their skin touches, the combined computing power might accidentally launch nuclear codes. We keep them three feet apart to prevent unauthorized data transfer." Spectators watched as the Prime Minister physically shoved their shoulders, but the CEOs remained frozen like a web browser with too many tabs open.

At press time, the Prime Minister attempted a group hug, causing both CEOs to buffer and eventually shut down for scheduled maintenance.

Inspired by the real story: Sam Altman and Dario Amodei awkwardly refused to hold hands during a photo op, sparking jokes about their rivalry. Read the full story.