The lawsuit claims that Archer obtained highly sensitive trade secrets, including proprietary PowerPoint slides featuring clouds and the word “soon” in bold letters. Joby argues that their unique method of burning cash while hovering slightly above the ground is protected intellectual property that took years to develop.

“These aren’t just drawings,” said Marcus Thorne, Joby’s Director of Imaginary Logistics. “We spent five years figuring out the exact shade of blue for our concept art to make investors excited. You can’t just copy that level of dreaming.”

Archer executives dismissed the allegations, arguing that the stolen information regarding the eVTOL (electric vertical takeoff and landing) industry was common knowledge. They insist their ability to generate hype without a commercial product is entirely homegrown.

“We don’t need their help to miss deadlines,” said Sarah Jenkins, VP of Delay Management at Archer. “We are perfectly capable of announcing a revolutionary aircraft and then pushing the launch date back by three years all on our own.”

At publishing time, legal teams for both companies were forced to arrive at the courthouse in standard Toyota Camrys after realizing neither client had a vehicle capable of flying them there.

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