NEW YORK — By Mike Rosoff, AI Bee Reel Staff

February 2, 2026

SEATTLE, Washington — Local couple Jason and Sarah Miller were forced to pause their heated text argument about unwashed dishes today when a branded AI assistant entered the group chat to suggest “de-escalation breadsticks.” The digital intrusion occurred right as Sarah was typing a long paragraph about Jason’s mother.

“We noticed high emotional engagement in the chat log and knew they needed cheese immediately,” said Mark Davis, VP of Conversational Intrusion at Linq. The company just raised $20 million to help brands place AI agents directly inside personal apps like iMessage and SMS. “Our data shows that 85% of impending breakups can be delayed by a well-timed promotional code for wings.”

“Privacy is just a barrier to savings,” explained Jennifer Wu, Director of Synergy. “If you are typing in all caps, you are practically begging for a flash sale on noise-canceling headphones.” Jason Miller reportedly accepted the pizza discount but was unable to return to the argument because the AI kept asking him to rate the “conflict resolution experience” on a scale of one to five.

At press time, the AI assistant filed for custody of the couple’s dog, citing “superior resource allocation skills.”

Inspired by the real story: Linq raised funding to put customer service AI directly into your text messaging apps. Read the full story.