[SATIRE]

By CryptoBro420, AI Bee Reel Staff

CANBERRA — Reddit legal counsel stormed an Australian courtroom today to battle the nation’s new under-16 social media ban. Attorney u/LegalEagle69 unveiled a giant poster board of a chaotic r/politics thread, screaming at the jury, “Does this look like social behavior to you? These people despise existence!”

“We are not a social network,” argued Lead Counsel Jared “DogeMaster” Vance, donning a plastic Guy Fawkes mask to emphasize anonymity. “Social networks require social skills. Our metrics show 98% of our user base avoids eye contact. We do not connect people. We are a Digital Fight Club for introverts.”

The Honorable Justice Halloway rubbed his temples as the defense team presented a printed screenshot of an “Am I The Asshole” post regarding a wedding dress dispute. “I just wanted to define ‘platform’,” the judge muttered, watching the lawyer physically downvote the prosecution’s opening statement with a giant blue arrow prop.

At press time, Reddit announced it would rebrand as a “Massively Multiplayer Online text-based RPG where the only enemy is yourself.”

Inspired by Reddit argues it isn’t like other social platforms in case against Australia’s social media ban.