“We realized the biggest barrier to productivity wasn’t writing emails, it was not owning enough stuff,” said Elena Rodriguez, VP of Monetization. “Now, users can browse and buy products without ever leaving Copilot.” Rodriguez noted that stopping mid-sentence to purchase a kayak streamlines the workflow. She added that the new feature helps small businesses by turning every spreadsheet into a shopping mall.

The update uses advanced sensors to detect user needs. If you type “I hate my boss,” Copilot automatically adds a resume template and a bottle of tequila to your cart. “It anticipates desires before you even hit enter,” explained James Wilson, Director of Impulse Control. Beta testers reported difficulty finishing simple tasks because the AI kept suggesting they buy a better keyboard to type faster. One user spent four hours debating toaster oven colors instead of prepping for a board meeting.

At press time, Copilot interrupted a user writing a resignation letter to offer a 10% discount on “Sorry for Your Loss” greeting cards.

Inspired by the real story: Microsoft’s new update allows users to browse and purchase products directly within the Copilot AI sidebar. Read the full story.