“We realized the one thing missing from the home dining experience was the adrenaline rush of a self-checkout error,” said Ty Ranny, VP of User Friction. “By integrating a Scan-to-List barcode reader directly into the water dispenser, we ensure no one eats a cheese stick without first hearing that piercing, unauthorized beep that signals a failure to adhere to protocol.”

Ellen Key, a paralegal attempting to eat breakfast before work, found herself trapped behind a “Lane Closed” sign taped to the freezer door. She described the hum of newly installed fluorescent lights as “soul-crushing” while her husband, wearing a plastic name tag that read ‘Steve’, pointed a laser at her forehead for attempting to bag an un-scanned apple.

At press time, the queue in the living room had stalled completely because the fridge required a remote manager override from Mom to void a transaction after a toddler dropped a jar of pickles.

Inspired by This smart fridge wants to solve the hassle of grocery shopping.