“We are empowering independent contractors to leverage generative assets to streamline the ‘physical possession’ phase of the delivery lifecycle,” said Chip Boardman, Head of Digital Fulfillment. “Why waste gas transporting cooling tacos when we can transmit a warm, 4K image of a taco directly to your doorbell’s cloud storage? It is zero-calorie efficiency that cuts overhead by 100%.”

Sarah Glum, a paralegal on a tight deadline, discovered the innovation during her lunch break. She opened her door to find only the smell of ozone and empty concrete, then checked her app to see a ‘Delivered’ notification accompanied by a generated image of a burger melting into a pixelated slurry. “I tried licking the notification on my phone screen, but it just tasted like warm glass and fingerprints,” she said.

At press time, the company launched a ‘Meta-Dash’ tier where drivers generate the food, the porch, and a smiling customer from a basement green screen to avoid traffic entirely.

Inspired by DoorDash says it banned driver who seemingly faked a delivery using AI.