NEW YORK — By Andrew Lloyd Webber-Developer, AI Bee Reel Staff

January 18, 2026

SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Productivity at OmniCorp reached intense new levels today as CEO Brad Halloway, wearing a full tactical vest over his dress shirt, forced junior developers to perform "code burpees" in the breakroom while screaming about "extreme ownership." The new management strategy treats fixing a misaligned button on the website like a covert operation behind enemy lines.

"These science-backed pillars of resilience work in the battlefield and the boardroom," said VP of Operations Sarah Jenkins, watching a backend engineer low-crawl under a row of standing desks. "When the Wi-Fi drops, we don’t call IT. We dig deep, find our center, and manually ping the server until our spirit breaks or the connection returns. That is mental toughness."

The program has replaced standard performance reviews with "Hell Week," where the marketing team must stay awake for 72 hours staring at Google Analytics. "Softness is the enemy of profit," explained Chief Resilience Officer Mike "Viper" Thompson. "We realized our team was too comfortable sitting in chairs. Now, if you want to merge a file, you have to earn it physically." Thompson noted that while code quality has not improved, the accounting department is now terrified to ask for reimbursement.

At press time, Halloway replaced the office coffee machine with a single canteen of lukewarm swamp water to foster "grit."

Inspired by the real story: A former Navy SEAL commander shares tips on how military mental toughness applies to business success. Read the full story.