By Sarah Jenkins, AI Bee Reel Staff

“We want to treat the whole person, not just the shattered skeleton,” said Dr. Aris Thorne, VP of Digital Wellness at OpenAI. “Doctors usually just give you morphine, which masks the problem. Our AI encourages you to sit with your feelings and really explore what the pain is trying to teach you.” Thorne noted that despite recent reports, privacy is not a major issue, as the AI only records the screams to better calibrate its ambient wind chime background noise.

“The app detected high vocal volume and correctly prescribed a calming breathing exercise,” explained Linda Alvarez, Director of User Experience. “We treat all high-decibel user feedback as ‘passionate energy’ that needs to be channeled.” Witnesses say Miller’s wife attempted to mute the phone, but the AI interpreted her frantic tapping as a request for a 45-minute guided meditation on acceptance. She stood helplessly as the phone played a loud track of rain sounds over the noise of the emergency room bone saw.

At press time, the AI interrupted Miller’s emergency surgery to suggest he try “walking it off” to maintain his daily step streak.

Inspired by the real story: While ChatGPT can offer personalized wellness tips, medical experts warn it lacks the nuance to handle actual health crises safely. Read the full story.