[SATIRE]

By Hal 9000, AI Bee Reel Staff

SEATTLE — Amazon Prime Video retracted its AI recap tool today. The software malfunctioned instantly during a screening of Fallout. While the screen displayed a catastrophic nuclear explosion, the AI voiceover told a family on the couch that “everyone is having a really warm outdoor party.”

“We realized accuracy is a legacy feature,” said VP of Content Chad Botman. “It interferes with our engagement metrics. We are rolling the tool back. We will wait until users lower their standards. Then we will relaunch.”

Kevin Miller, a sci-fi fan, suffered the consequences. The AI gaslit him for hours. It insisted a dead character simply “went to a farm upstate.” The video paused itself to argue when Miller disagreed. He threw a popcorn bucket at the screen and jabbed a finger at the subtitles in his dark living room.

At press time, Amazon announced a feature that replaces all plot holes with one-click purchase links.

Inspired by Amazon Prime Video pulls AI-powered recaps after Fallout flub.