[SATIRE]

LOS ANGELES — A new study reveals that 97 percent of listeners cannot identify AI music. Streaming executives are calling this the “golden age of good enough.”

The study asked people to listen to pop songs and guess the creator. Most failed. Industry leaders say this validates their new strategy. “We view this as a victory for efficiency,” said Sanjay Patel, VP of Content Optimization. “The results confirm what we hoped. If customers cannot hear that the artist has no soul, we do not need to pay for one.”

Critics say the AI music sounds generic and repetitive. Companies argue that is the point. They want music that fills silence without costing money. “We are targeting the ‘dentist waiting room’ demographic,” explained Chloe Dubois, Head of Generative Assets. “We want songs that are legally distinct but totally forgettable. The goal is audio wallpaper. It should be pleasant enough to hear, but not good enough to remember.”

Dubois noted that human artists are risky. They have opinions and ask for royalties. AI artists simply generate content until the server is full. “Why hire a drummer?” asked Dubois. “Our software can simulate a beat that is 90 percent accurate. The study proves that 90 percent is all the human ear deserves.”

At press time, the company announced a “Human Touch” add-on. For $5 extra a month, the algorithm will play one song written by a person.

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